


World's Best Face

by omonna



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Fluff, M/M, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 13:08:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15841932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/omonna/pseuds/omonna
Summary: Dotae Coffee Shop AU with a twistTaeyong's friends drag him to the hottest place in Seoul called 'The Diss Cafe'. There's only one problem. Taeyong's face can't be dissed.Where Doyoung is a barista, Taeyong's face is beautiful and Ten is salty.





	World's Best Face

**Author's Note:**

> This is just some fluff with bad insults thrown around :D This may be the dumbest fic you've ever read, so read at your own risk ;)

 

 

Taeyong, having lived in Seoul his whole life, has seen many different cafes. He remembered when dog cafes were the weirdest thing people heard about. Then came the maid cafes, the cafes with wild animals, even robot cafes. But nothing could prepare him for where Ten and Jaehyun happily dragged him.

“ _’The Diss Café’_ ” Taeyong read, squinting his eyes. “Guys what is this?”

“This, my dear friend, is the hottest place in Seoul right now” Ten said excited as he and Jaehyun forcefully pushed Taeyong inside. “I can’t wait to see what the barista calls you two.”

Taeyong looked around the café. It was surprisingly pink, but other than that it looked normal. He quickly spotted a huge board with _rules_ written on it and went to see what was it all about.

The rules, it turns out were fairly simple. The barista makes you coffee you ordered, but instead of writing your name on a cup as usual, he writes a diss about you. The café assured that all the disses were a joke between the employees and customers and asked people not to get overly sensitive. People with self-esteem problems were asked to refrain from buying coffee there.

“I don’t understand” Taeyong said after reading the rules. “Why would anyone in their right mind pay someone to insult them?”

“Come on, TY” Jaehyun said as he wrapped his arm around the smaller boy’s shoulder. “This is just for fun. Most people come here with friends to laugh at the interesting insults the barista makes. I heard they even make the baristas insult their boss at a job interview to see if they’re good. Let’s get going, the coffee won’t buy itself.”

Jaehyun lead them in the direction of the counter. To Taeyong’s surprise there was a huge queue in front of him, and people who just received their drinks were all talking and laughing excitedly while quoting their friends new nicknames.

“This is way more people than I imagined” Taeyong said to Ten as they moved slowly to the front of the line.

“Hell yeah, I told you this place is popular. A lot of influential bloggers rated the café, and now young people want to see it for themselves.” Said Ten as their finally reached the counter.

In front of them stood the barista, a tall guy with black hair framing his handsome face. On his nameplate it said _Kim Doyoung_ , and beneath it there was a star with words: **_STAR DISSER_** in gold letters and ‘ _Disser of the month’_ below it.

“Wow look, we got the disser of the month to serve us!” Ten was delighted as he spoke to the employee. “I’m waiting for a good line from you!”

The barista looked at him impassively and raised his eyebrow. “ Are you ready to order, or are we going to wait here until tomorrow?”

“It’s already starting” Jumped Ten, who in Taeyong’s opinion was too easily amused. “What do you guys want?”

“One iced Americano for me”  Jaehyun was as amused as Ten was.

Taeyong looked at the menu. “I hope one of you is buying, since you dragged me here. I want Caramel macchiato, with extra caramel please” He smiled at the barista, in an attempt to soften the insult later.

“Fine, I’ll pay but only because I don’t want to hear your whining later” Ten rolled his eyes. “Latte macchiato for me, please. That will be all.”

“Okay, please wait for your orders to be completed” The boy said and got busy making their beverages.

“Is the coffee even good here? If the employees focus mostly on their insults, the quality may be forgotten” Taeyong prided himself as the coffee connoisseur, even though all the ever drank were over sweetened macchiatos. 

Jaehyun nodded his head “I’ve heard it’s really good actually, but I guess we will have to drink it to find out.”

“Look, the barista is coming back” Ten nudged Jaehyun with his elbow. “I can’t fucking wait to see it.”

“There you go, coffee for three” The barista said as the gave each of them their own cup, never once smiling. Taeyong guessed arrogant attitude kind of came with the job description.

“Thanks” They said as they made their way to one of the only unoccupied tables in the room.

“Okay it’s time to look at our cups!” Jaehyun grinned when they sat down. “ _’Hey, Dimple Boy. Somewhere out there, there’s a tree whose single purpose on earth is to replace the oxygen you waste. Go find it and apologize_.’” Jaehyun read, eyes widening.

“Oh my god” Ten giggled, hands flying to the table to support him. He looked at Taeyong, who tried to keep his face straight, but failed. “Tae, you have to admit this is hilarious.”

Taeyong was starting to see the fun in the whole insult thing. When made as a joke about his friends it was quite amusing. “Hey Ten, you’re next.”

“Dear Hobbit” Ten started and rolled his eyes. “I knew he will go after my height. Let’s read more. ‘ _Dear Hobbit. I would cut off your head, if it stood but a little higher from the ground_.”

It was Jaehyun’s turn to fall on the table, not even able to support himself.

“Isn’t this a quote from Lord of the Rings?” He breathed out 5 minutes later, when his laughter subsided considerably. Even Ten couldn’t control his sniggering, as the three of them cracked up again.

“Okay TY, now it’s your turn. I can’t wait to hear what he had to say about you” Ten was finally out for blood again, ready to laugh at his friend's expense.

The pink haired boy looked at his cup with expectation, but turned red immediately after reading the words on his cup.

“Well, what is it” Ten said impatiently, leg already going up and down. “Are you going to read it?”

Taeyong remained silent, rereading the words again. Jaehyun was the first one to get worried. “Is everything alright? Did he cross the line? Give me the cup.”

Jaehyun reached for the cup and snatched it before Taeyong could react. He quickly scanned the writing and grinned so wide the Cheshire cat would be proud.

“Ten, this is gold. ‘ _To: Cherry Blossom. I’m sorry but I can’t insult a person with a face as beautiful as yours._ ‘” Jaehyun could barely finish the sentence, dissolving into giggles immediately after.

Ten on the other hand looked offended. “What does he mean Taeyong is too beautiful! This is a dissing cafe, everyone has to be dissed! Plus, aren’t I beautiful as well?” he grumbled under his nose.

“Well, apparently not to” The tallest boy looked at the counter to read the nametag “ _Doyoung_ the barista” He chuckled again.

Taeyong also looked behind the counter, ignoring Ten’s grumblings of ‘ _disser of the month my ass, he can’t even diss Taeyong’._ Doyoung was doing his job, not looking their way even once.

“Do you think he has hots for Taeyong? Or he really couldn’t think about an insult on the spot?” Jaehyun wondered aloud when Ten calmed down and they were finally drinking their coffee.

“He better have the hots for him, because otherwise I won’t tolerate this!” Ten crossed his arms.

“You have to admit Tae is a little hard to insult based on appearance” Both Jaehyun and Ten turned around to look at the pink haired boy, who blushed as pink as his hair.

“Guys, stop it” He covered his face with his hands, not able to withstand the staring.

Ten nodded at Jaehyun’s words but still threw a glare at the barista. “Well, we’re not the star dissers around here, we don’t need to have that ability.”

The coffee, as it turned out was as good as the reviews said. The gang finished it fairly quickly and got up to leave. But before they were out of the door Ten turned around to glare at the barista once again.

“He better find an insult” He said, a weird glint in his eyes. “Because tomorrow, we’re coming back.”

“What?! TEN.” Taeyong ran after his friend who already left the café, but didn’t receive any response.

Jaehyun slowly shook his head as he closed the doors behind them _. How is it possible that I’m the youngest here._

 

 

***

 

 

Just as Ten promised, they were back the next day. Taeyong could only hope that the boy behind the counter would be absent, but of course the universe always conspired against him. When they entered Ten immediately went to stand in the line, embarrassed Taeyong and amused Jaehyun tagging a step behind him. They made small talk as they waited to reach the counter, the queue seemingly longer than it was yesterday.

When they finally reached the barista, Ten threw Doyoung another glare.

“You” He said while pointing a finger at the boy. “You better do your job properly!”

Jaehyun was clearly having the time of his life as he once again ordered the same drinks, on Ten’s tab.

The black haired boy still had the same unamused expression when he served them, but his eyes met Taeyong’s when he gave him his drink. The smaller boy turned red again and quickly left for the table after giving Doyoung a small nod of thanks.

When they sat down Ten immediately abandoned his own cup in favor of reaching for Taeyong’s. This time the boy was quicker though, and he immediately took it out of his friends reach to read it first. When he blushed once again Ten sighed.

“Just read it already!” he prompted.

“ _’Hello, Sun and Moon. I've counted all the stars before and I think I've missed two. I found them in your eyes today’_ ” Taeyong stuttered through the massage, words actually cheesier than yesterday.

Ten was of course side eyeing the barista the moment he heard the word ‘Sun’.

“I am offended on the behalf of all the pretty people who got insulted when you didn’t” He said unhappy, although his lips went up and down, as if he was holding his laughter. “He‘s just using pick up lines now.”

“I think it’s cute. Our Taeyongie got himself an admirer” Jaehyun pointed at Ten with his chin. “Go on, read yours. Maybe it says something cute too.”

Ten, with renewed excitement, reached for his own cup but his face turned sour again when he read the words there.

“ _‘You again Hobbit? Sneaky little hobbitses... I don't know half of you half as well as I should like... and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.’_ ” Ten’s face turned more and more confused the more he read. “I’m not entirely sure what does it mean, but I’m certain it’s an insult?”

Jaehyun and Taeyong burst out laughing at Ten’s words, and the shortest boy grumbled while he reread the words a few times. “Yah! Stupid smart people and their stupid smart insults! What’s yours?”

“You should be proud, out of us three you get the coolest insults” Jaehyun pouted as he read his. “ _'For: Jock wannabe. You seem as strong as an ox and almost as intelligent.''_ ”

Ten giggled, his mood lifted significantly after finding out that at least his insults were the best. The trio drunk their coffee as they talked, the pink haired boy sometimes stealing glances at the barista behind the counter. He was undeniably handsome and Taeyong would be lying if he said that the lack of insults didn’t flatter him. However, he was too shy to just come up to the boy and ask for his number.

 

 

***

 

 

Taeyong was too busy to go to the café the next few weeks. He was studying to become a veterinarian, which took most of his time, especially now that he had to intern for a big veterinarian clinic. That didn’t stop him from receiving updates from the shop though, because apparently Ten went there with their other friends every few days. Taeyong and Jaehyun shared an opinion that he will go there until one of the baristas finally acknowledges his ‘beauty’. (Although Ten denied it and maintained he went because all of their friends were eager to visit after hearing about the story of Taeyong’s admirer).

The first few times Ten went without Taeyong, he reported that ‘ _Taeyong’s barista’_ as they came to call him, was nowhere to be seen. Instead another handsome man took his place. Apparently he was Japanese, but that didn’t make his insults any weaker. As a result, Ten got yet another nickname from the café, this time it was _Smurf_ courtesy of his blue shirt he wore that one day. It kind of picked up between his friends, and now half of them called him Smurf if they wanted to make fun of him, which irritated him endlessly.

The first time Ten met Doyoung without Taeyong he was left fuming so much he barged into Taeyong’s room without knocking as soon as he came home.

“I didn’t even get a diss this time! All I got was ‘ _Hey dwarf, where’s Snow White_ ’” Ten said glaring at Taeyong, as if his lack of insult was his fault.

Taeyong rolled his eyes and they could hear Jaehyun laughing at Ten from the kitchen. “Cute” He shouted. “I ship it.”

“I ship it too, but I told Johnny today that I always get the best insults among us, only to be totally ignored by Doyoung in his quest for our princess’s love!” Ten shouted back, pouting.

“I can’t believe you became a regular at a dissing café” Taeyong laughed as Ten sat down on his bed.

“It’s surprisingly fun” Ten shrugged as Jaehyun came into the room, sandwich in hand. “But it’s time to talk about important things. When are you going back?”

Taeyong shrugged. “I don’t know, I’m pretty busy right now…”

“You should never be too busy for love! You know what they say, third time’s a charm!”

“Yeah, Tae, I think you should go soon too. The star employee refused to diss you twice, if that’s not a declaration of love I don’t know what is.” Jaehyun stated, mouth full.

“That speech would be more inspiring if you didn’t have bread in your mouth” Taeyong said but he knew his friends were right.

“Johnny thinks you should definitely go soon” Ten added. “Jungwoo said he’s jealous, Yuta called him Ghostface with grandma voice” he giggled. “Jaemin, Renjun and Jeno say they want to meet him as soon as you guys get together.”

“Ten! Did you seriously tell that story to every single one of our friends?!” Taeyong was scandalized. “There’s no getting together yet!”

“Of course I told everyone, you are our source of entertainment!” The shortest boy said proudly while Jaehyun nodded guiltily.

“Dear God, why am I friends with idiots and gossipers” Taeyong looked at the ceiling in a search for answers.

 

 

***

 

 

Taeyong, of course, did end up going to café sooner than he expected, dragged by Ten. He wondered briefly, as Ten took a hold of his arm at home and didn’t release it until they reached ‘The Diss Café’, why does he let Ten make important decisions for him.

Jaehyun couldn’t go this time, so he sulked until they left.

“Can’t you go when I don’t have the most important class this week?! I want to see it too” He pouted.

“I told you Yuta said this is Doyoung’s only shift for the next few days! We have to do it now!” Ten shook his head, secretly glad that at least he was going to witness it.

“When did you even get so friendly with Yuta, anyway!” Taeyong glared at them both, still thinking about refusing to go.

“When someone calls you Smurf at least twice a week you are bound to become acquaintances” Ten shrugged matter-of-factly, and they couldn’t refute.

So when they finally reached the café, Taeyong was a ball of nerves. He almost started to bite his nails again, but Ten slapped his hand every time it so much as moved towards his mouth. With the amount of glee he didn’t think possible his shorter friend opened the door and lead them to the shockingly empty café. Only a few people were around, already sitting at their tables.

“Ah, the beauty of slow hours! Come on” Ten pushed him towards the empty counter where Doyoung stood, already staring at them.

“Hi” Taeyong said shyly when they stood in front of the boy.

Doyoung didn’t even look at Ten, who stood next to the pink haired boy (and he later complained about that fact for an hour). For the first time he smiled slightly and asked, voice nicer than Taeyong has ever heard. “Hi. Would you like to order?”

“Yeah… Caramel Macchiato with double caramel and Latte for Ten” He said proud that his voice didn’t shake.

“Coming right up” Doyoung said, and winked just before turning around.

Taeyong wasn’t proud of the noise he made after that.

“You sound like a dying whale. Let’s hope he didn’t hear that or he _will_ finally have something to insult you about.” Ten was laughing in the background.

They didn’t talk when they waited for their cups, simply because the pink haired boy couldn’t even think properly. When their coffee arrived he hurriedly took their cups and went to a table not far away. He gave Ten his drink and looked at his own.

“Huh?”

“What! What does it say! Come on don’t leave me hanging” His friend whined impatiently.

“ _’Dear Hobbit. Just go back to Middle-earth so I don’t have to see you again’_ ” Taeyong read confused and Ten quickly looked at his own cup.

“You idiot, you have my order! Give it back. Here, read this!” Ten said exasperated while exchanging cups with Taeyong.

“ _’TO: World’s best face. I would love to be your tears, to be born in your eyes, live on your cheeks… My shift ends in 10 minutes, you up for a date?’_ ” Taeyong read and laughed before he could stop himself.

Ten giggled as well. “That escalated quickly. From cheesy poetry to asking you out on a date.”

They sat in silence for a moment, Taeyong looking at his cup and contemplating while Ten looking smug, as if all of this was his hard work.

“Well, aren’t you going to go and say yes?” Ten prompted.

“What are you even still doing here” Taeyong laughed as he got up and made his way to the empty counter.

When he stood in front of Doyoung he could see that the boy was nervous as well. He fidgeted as he waited for the answer. Taeyong took a deep breath before finally making a move.

“Roses are red. Violets are blue. I would love to go on a date with you.”

Doyoung raised his eyebrow but laughed amused. “That was cute” He said. “Lame, but cute.”

Taeyong grinned as well and they looked at each other for a second.

“So what’s your name?” the barista finally asked. “ I keep calling you ‘World’s best face’ in my mind but that won’t work in the long run.”

Taeyong’s eyes widened when he realized that he never gave the boy his name. He blushed. “Sorry about that. I’m Taeyong.”

“Well Taeyong, go sit down. Your friend finally left so wait five more minutes and we’re free to go wherever we want. How does another café sound?” Doyoung winked.

“It sounds awful” the smaller boy laughed. He turned around to sit down but not before adding. “I’ll be waiting.”

( Ten did leave but not before taping their whole conversation on his phone. Needless to say Taeyong’s rhyme was a huge hit among their friends and they teased him endlessly until Doyoung told them to stop.)

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it to the end I'm impressed :D I really wanted to write a story about Doyoung not being able to diss Taeyong's face even if he had to, so this fic was born. I have no idea if a Dissing Cafe really exists anywhere, although if it does Doyoung and Yuta would be hired on a spot I think.  
> Both first and second insults about Hobbits Ten gets are quotes from Lord of the Rings.  
> Ten's attitude was inspired by Heechul in NCT on air, when Jaehyun said Taeyong didn't have any flaws and Heechul was like 'Then find some!!!!'. I always laugh at that part so I wanted to include a person like that :D  
> Btw, the whole cafe is owned by Taeil, who enjoys making good money by making his employees insult people ;)  
> If you want, come find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/taeyongaee).


End file.
